The Way of Choice
by Lachesis
Summary: (rating for future chapters...) Kagome's feeling pulled in all directions. Nothing new there, but see how she sorts it all out this time.
1. High School Blues

_A/N are in the profile.  Thanks to Iron Raven-kun, who gave me the 3 girls names, as well as backing up my thoughts on the whole high school thing (technical term)._

            "Kagome!  I'm so glad you made it to school today!"

            Kagome turned at Eri's voice.  Her other two friends stood on either side of Eri.  All three looked relieved.  

            "What's going on today?" Kagome asked.  Miroku demanded a day of rest and meditation, or else she wouldn't have been here at all.  Inuyasha had been pushing extra hard lately, looking for pieces of the Shikon Jewel.  Kagome was suspicious the day of rest was so she could see her family.  It had been three weeks after all.

            Yuka grinned broadly.  "You have been gone so long!  You didn't know today was the high school visitation day."

            Eri grabbed Kagome's hands, and pulled her closer to the school.  "High Schools from all over Tokyo are here today to try an interest us."

            Kagome looked panicked.  "I'm so far behind in my studies!  They wouldn't be interested in me!"  Her exclamation brought sympathetic looks from her friends.

            "Don't worry," Yuka said.  "They are looking at test scores and your scores are still fine."

            "Yeah.  I work well under pressure," Kagome thought out loud sarcastically, thinking of all the pressure she'd been under lately from Inuyasha. 

            The other three girls glanced curiously at Kagome.  "Are you ok?" Harumi asked.

            "Of course I am!" Kagome exclaimed, putting on her best forced smile and changing the subject.  "So, when is the visiting?"

            "First thing this morning," Eri said as she drug Kagome into the building.

***

Kagome walked home from school alone.  She had begged off from going for ice cream with her friends, saying she didn't feel good.  She sighed heavily as she regretted the lie.  _At least Grandpa's excuses are good for something._

            Her mind wandered back to the visits this morning.  Over and over again, she heard the rejections in her head.  _Higurashi-san, you have missed so many days.  How do you do so well on your tests but so poorly on your school work?  Are you feeling any better?  Perhaps you should spend some time healing rather than going to high school._

            With all the voices of rejection running through her mind, she came quickly to the Shrine steps.  Again, she sighed as she started her way up the steps.  Just under her breath, she practiced what she'd tell her mama.  "Mama, I'm not going to high school."  _No, I **want to go to high school… I think. **_  "Mama, I'm going to focus on my studies.  You can tell Inuyasha to just go back through the well where he came from."  Kagome sighed again.  _I couldn't bear to not see Inuyasha again._

            She stopped in front of her front door.  _Mama, I don't know what I want to do with my future.  Kagome nodded almost imperceptibly then pushed the door open.  "Mama, I'm home."  _

            "Kagome-chan, I'm in the kitchen," her mother's warm voice answered her from the back.  Kagome kicked off her shoes and followed her voice to the kitchen.

            "Hello mama," Kagome said, giving her mother a kiss on the cheek while avoiding the sudsy dish water.

            "How was school today, dear?" her mother asked, pulling her hands out of the water and drying them on a towel.

            "Oh, mama," Kagome sighed, sitting at the table.  "They were asking us about high school today."

            Kagome's mom sat down at the table with Kagome.  "Oh?" She fixed her daughter with an open gaze.  "And what did you find out?"

            Kagome sighed again.  "I've missed so much school, many of the high schools will have nothing to do with me."  Kagome looked at her folded hands.

            "Oh, Kagome," her mother started.

            "but," Kagome interrupted, "One of the western styled high schools said I would do well there.  Their studies are highly individualized, since so many attending are from the military bases.  It will be Western-centric but if I'm out, they won't care much."

            Kagome's mother looked thoughtful.  "Did you tell them you wanted to be a doctor?"

            "Of course, mama," she grinned, thinking about the response shed received to that.  "The high school already has a medical prep program in place.  They also get their students discounts at a college in California, America."  

            Mrs. Higurashi nodded, thinking more.  "Will you be finished with your quest by the time you're ready for university?"

            "What do you mean?"  Kagome asked, puzzled.  Then, her eyes opened wide as she realized her mother's question.  "Oh!  I'm planning on attending Tokyo University still."

            Frowning, her mother shook her head.  "They'd never take the Western High school's scores, since its here in Tokyo.  They'll think you took the easy way out."

            Kagome threw her hands up in defeat.  "Then I just don't know what to do."  She laid her head down on her arms on the table.  _Maybe this will all go away._

            Mrs. Higurashi touched her daughter's head lightly.  "Kagome-chan, you can always take time off from school and work here at the shrine."  Her rhythmic hair stroking kept Kagome's tears at bay.  "Your Jii-chan is getting old after all.  I'm sure he'd appreciate an extra set of hands."

            Kagome swallowed hard, to keep from crying and sat up.  _I can't give up.  I really want to go to school, Mama."_

            The smile she gave Kagome didn't quite reach her eyes.  "Do you really, Kagome-chan?  You haven't made school a priority for well over a year now.  Are you sure it's still that important to you?"

            Kagome opened her mouth to answer.  Before she said anything her mind's eye saw Inuyasha standing in front of her.  It was one of the rare times he wasn't glaring or yelling.  _He was smiling at me and Shippou, Kagome remembered, __and I wasn't supposed to see.  "You're right, mama, I need to figure out my priorities first."  Kagome's eyes were distant, and Mrs. Higurashi knew her thoughts were in another time.  _

            Kagome stood up and shook her head to clear her thoughts.  She turned to leave the kitchen.

            "Dinner will be ready early tonight," Higurashi-san said, also rising.  "IF Inuyasha comes before then, invite him to dinner."

            "Yes mama," Kagome said, leaving the room.  _Are my priorities even the same as his?_


	2. Meditation and Relaxation?

_A/N:  Thanks to Iron Raven-kun who double-checked all my references.  Other notes are in my profile_

            In feudal era Japan, Inuyasha sat cross-legged next to Miroku.  His hands were folded into his sleeves and his eyes were closed.  If not for the occasional sigh and twitching ear, he would've seemed asleep.

            "I don't get it, Miroku.  How is sitting here bored supposed to help me fight?"  His voice held annoyance and it made him sound suspiciously like a bratty child.

            "We've been over this before, Inuyasha," Miroku responded patiently and opened one eye.  "Those with a troubled spirit cannot focus to the best of their abilities during a fight."

            Inuyasha interrupted angrily.  "I am focused when I fight."  He stood up and started pacing.  "Sitting silently is not training.  Why didn't Sango come back with me after lunch?"

            Inuyasha's abrupt change of subject made Miroku jump slightly.  He did not stand, but he did fix Inuyasha with what he hoped was the glare of a sensei.  "What do you mean?  What did you and Sango do this morning?"

            "Hentai!" Inuyasha growled and fell to the ground, collapsing on his back.  "She said you told her to bring me here to meditate with me.  But she couldn't sit still neither.  She showed me some movement stuff.  Don't remember what it was called, but she said something about exercising my energy."  Inuyasha got comfortable on the grass, and started at the patterns the tree made.

            "Ah," Miroku visibly relaxed.  "She walked you through some chi exercises."

            Inuyasha snorted some sort of ascent.

            "No wonder you're restless, but this will be as good for you as what Sango was doing."  Miroku continued, allowing Inuyasha no room for argument.

            "I don't need to meditate to be a better fighter.  All I need is practice," Inuyasha still insisted.  

            _No wonder so few decide to study the way of Buddha.  "IF you are able to focus better in battle, then you are better able to protect Kagome."  Miroku settled back into meditation position, and closed his eyes.  __Cruel, but that will get him, I think._

            Inuyasha snorted again, but sat up.  "What would you have me do, Miroku?"

            Miroku sighed, recalling his days as a youth and his first meditation sessions.  _They were boring, except when I had someone telling me what to do.  Maybe some guided sessions with Inuyasha would work._  "Sit next to me, Inuyasha.  Like I'm sitting."

            Inuyasha sat cross legged next to Miroku, and folded his hands into his sleeves.

            "No, Inuyasha.  Hands out front.  So they don't wander."  Miroku spoke, his mind racing ahead to the exercise and only half listening to what he said.

            Inuyasha growled "Hentai" under his breath, but did as he was asked.  His hands pressed together lightly in front of him.  His heavy red sleeves almost instantly fell to his elbows.  Inuyasha shook his arm at it, annoyed, and tried to get it back to his wrist.  His white shirt was still fastened at his wrist, comfortably.  But the red sleeve wouldn't budge.

            Miroku said nothing, but had to bite his tongue from laughter when Inuyasha stood up and jerked the jacket off in one movement.  He collapsed back to the ground and easily took up the proper position.  His jacket was abandoned to the side, half covering a small shrub in his careless toss.  "Are you ready?"  Miroku asked, when Inuyasha was finally still.

            Inuyasha growled again.  "Yes bozou.  Get on with it."

            Miroku took a deep breath, then started.  "Breathe in deeply.  Hold.  Breathe out."  He repeated this several times, relaxing.  Becoming more aware of his surroundings.  Without trying to force Inuyasha to behave, he was finally able to appreciate the beauty of the creek bank they were sitting on. 

            "Breathe in and imagine you are breathing in live.  Breathe out and exhale all your pain.  Breathe in and let life fill your body.  Breathe out and let pain leave."  Miroku changed the mantra.  In his mind, the sweet scent of flowers was filling his body.  The water from the stream carried away his dark thoughts and breath.  

            Next to his impromptu sensei, the reluctant student was becoming more relaxed.  _Breathing is easy,_ he thought, taking in another "breath of life".  In his mind's eye, the tree on the other side of the creek was replaced by his God Tree.  His body started relaxing as he imagined breathing the air that had surrounded him for so long.

            Just when he was relaxed to the point of almost being asleep, Miroku's voice broke in.  "Now, picture all those you've cared about in your mind."  _Feh, this I boring, Inuyasha thought, even as Miroku's words pulled images up in his mind.  First and foremost and closest to him was Kagome.  _

            Miroku didn't give him time to question the images before he started talking again.  "Pick one of those you care for and focus on that person.  With each breath, bring that person more into focus."

            Inuyasha visualized his mother.  He imagined he was walking up to her, all the others he cared for were standing forgotten behind him.  _Mother._

            Miroku's guiding voice was soft, and to the point where Inuyasha could let the words roll of him if he wanted to.  "With each exhale, release the hurt this person has done to you.  With each inhale, breathe in peace."  Miroku repeated this mantra until Inuyasha's breathing evened out and no longer caught in his throat.  

            "Ask this person to lead you to the next person in your life."

***

"Sango, why are you guys working so hard with Inuyasha today?"  Shippou was as curious as ever, talking non-stop to Sango while they collected herbs for Kaede.  

            "Hm….?" Sango pulled herself from her thoughts to listen more closely to Shippou.  "Why do you ask?"

            Shippou stopped pulling weeds and looked at Sango instead.  "You guys normally leave Inuyasha alone to mope while Kagome's gone," he reasoned out loud.  "Why are you prodding him to do stuff today?"  His eyes widened as he thought of the most dramatic possibility.  "Kagome is coming back, isn't she?"

            "Of course she is, Shippou-chan," Sango also stopped looking for herbs and turned her gaze to the kit.  "Why would you think such a thing?  She always comes back to us."  

            Shippou looked relieved.  "Well, how am I supposed to know why you're working with Inuyasha?  I'm just a kid.  You guys don't tell me nothing."

            "Houshi-sama had to find an excuse for Kagome-chan to go visit her family," Sango interrupted, cutting Shippou's tantrum off at the pass.  "Inuyasha wouldn't break to let her leave, so Houshi-sama and I came up with the idea that today should be a day of meditation."  She sat down on the ground, so she was more level with Shippou.  _This is going to be one of those long conversations, so I had better get comfortable.  _

            "Oh, so you tricked Inuyasha!"  Shippou grinned like a spoiled kid who wasn't punished when he was caught stealing food.  Then, he seemed to think of something else.  "But, why are you actually working with him, then?"  He tilted his head to the side, showing his confusion.  

            Sango shrugged, glancing to the forest she knew Miroku and Inuyasha were behind.  "Houshi-sama convinced me that Inuyasha would benefit from a more formalized training, since he learned everything on his own."  She fixed the kit with a warm smile, even though her eyes were distant with memory.  "I figured it wouldn't hurt.  I taught him most of the Energy Training dance my village hunters use…used.  I think Houshi-sama is actually meditating with him."

            "Will you teach me, Sango?"  Shippou looked serious.  "I can learn anything Inuyasha can learn."  _I am a full demon after all._

            Sango tilted her head to the side in thought.  _He seems so young to learn, but demons do age slower.  Plus, starting training early is a good way to mold the child to do it right later.  "Hai, we can train too."  She stood up and grabbed their basket.  "Let's take these to Kaede-sama."_

***

            "Are there others you care for that you need to talk to, Inuyasha?"  Miroku calmly intruded on Inuyasha's thoughts.

            By this time, Inuyasha was in every bit of the meditative transe that Miroku was hoping for.  His breathing didn't change, his eyes didn't open.  His mouth formed the word, "Iie."

            "Good," Miroku affirmed, moving to the next step.  _That took a long while, Inuyasha.  You care for more than you let on._  "Now, imagine you are facing all of those you hate.  They are standing motionless in front of you.  They will only respond if you speak to them." 

            Inuyasha let out an involuntary growl from his chest.  In front of him was a handful of people.

            "Pick one of those you hate, and focus on that person.  To face them, you must have cold hate.  To defeat them, you must have understanding."  Miroku's new direction did not awaken Inuyasha.  _He fought this so much, but only one who is truly willing to learn would have made it so far.  "Breathe in cold air, breathe out hot air.  Breathe in order, breathe out chaos."  Miroku waited for Inuyasha's breathing to level out.  He could feel the new sense of purpose starting to radiate off Inuyasha.  _

            "Now, to the next person."

***

The clearing was on the other side of the village from where Miroku and Inuyasha were practicing.  Sango had picked it, hoping that any flux in Shippou's youkai wouldn't set off warnings in Inuyasha.  _They've been fighting together long enough, I bet Inuyasha can tell when Shippou's in trouble, or when he's just practicing._  She had made sure that the clearing was away from the village by a comfortable distance.  Kirara was posted on the side closest to the village, to look out for anyone approaching.  

Sango handed Shippou a thick stick, proportionate to his size.  She had a larger one for herself.  "This is the tool.  In life, it may be any tool.  A pot, a chain, a sword or your bare hands."  Sango was reciting as if from memory.  "All tools are an extension of self.  It is never the tool that wins.  It is the self.  It is never the tool that loses.  It is the self."  Sango broke her recitation and looked at Shippou.  "Each lesson starts by reciting that litany."  She was in teacher mode, and Shippou listened attentively.  "The more you practice and start with those words, the more sense they will make to you."  She grinned at Shippou, looking more like her normal self.  "Are you ready to begin?"

            "Hai, Sango-sensei," Shippou said with a mischievous grin.  _That was worth it,_ he thought, as a blush crossed Sango's cheeks.  


End file.
